Communication

Judge Jeffries was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and asks, 'What exactly are the grounds for your divorce?'

Amy replied, 'Approximately four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by.'

'No,' Judge Jeffries continued, 'I mean what is the foundation of this case?'
'It is made of concrete, brick and mortar,' responded Amy promptly.

'I mean,' he sighed, 'What are your relations like?'
'Ah well, I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my husband's parents.'

Judge Jeffries asked, 'Do you have a real grudge?'
'No, we haven't,' Amy replied, 'We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one.'

'Please,' Judge Jeffries took a deep breath and tried again, 'is there any infidelity in your marriage?'
'Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is yes,' smiled Amy.

'Ma'am,' Judge Jeffries raised his voice, 'does your husband ever beat you up?'
'Oh yes,' Amy responded, 'about twice a week he gets up earlier than I do.'

Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, 'Lady, why do you want a divorce?'
'Oh, I don't want a divorce,' Amy replied. 'I've never wanted a divorce. My husband does. He said he can't communicate with me.'

Reasons I voted Democrat:

I believe oil companies' profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene but the government taxing the same gallon of gas at 15% isn't.

I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.

Because freedom of speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

Because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I've decided to marry my horse.

Because when we pull out of Iraq I trust that the bad guys will stop what they're doing because they now think we're good people.

Because I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves.

I believe that people who can't tell us if it will rain on Friday can tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don't start driving a Prius.

I believe that business should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as THEY see fit.

I believe liberal judges need to rewrite The Constitution every few days when someone cannot get their agendas past the voters.

Virtual Theft

I wonder if the Judge plays...